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🎉 Holiday Jokes

Holiday jokes have a nice built-in charm because they come with decorations, traditions, food, and expectations people already recognize. Christmas, Halloween, birthdays, and other celebrations all give jokes a little extra personality.

If you want humor that feels timely, cheerful, and easy to share with family or friends, this page is worth exploring.

Engineering Students Build a Plane

A group of engineering students and their teacher were given free airplane tickets to go on a holiday.
Once on the plane, the captain announced that they were on the plane that the students had built. Everyone freaked and rushed out of the plane, except for the teacher who stayed there calmly. When the flight attendant asked why he hadn’t left, he responded, “I know the abilities of my students. This box won’t even start”.

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The First Holiday Dedicated to Clowns

Just one day ago, we celebrated the first ever holiday dedicated to clowns.
It was jesterday.

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How Do You Pronounce Albuquerque?

A husband and wife on a holiday were driving through New Mexico.
As they approached Albuquerque, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the name of the city. The husband thought it was pronounced like Albu-que-que, while the wife thought it was pronounced like Albu-kway-kway. They argued back and forth, then they stopped for lunch. At the counter, the husband said to the restaurant worker, “Before we order, could you settle an argument for us? Can you please pronounce the name of the place we’re in?”
She leaned over the counter and said, “Burger King.”

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Birthdays on Christmas

People with birthdays falling on Christmas shouldn’t mind that gifts are combined for the holiday…
Jesus sure didn’t.

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Cruise Ship Waitstaff During the Holidays

During the holidays, let’s take a moment to think about the waitstaff on cruise ships..
Never forget these uniformed men and women, serving over seas.

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Tommy’s Holiday With His Stepdad

Tommy comes back from his holiday with his mum, and his stepdad and the teacher ask him, “Hello Tommy, did you enjoy your holiday?”
“I did, Teacher.”
“And did your stepdad take you out, show you things, go exploring?”
“Yes, he did, teacher, he took me out rowing 1/2 a mile into the lake every day, and then I’d swim back.”
“Oh, well, um, it’s an awful long way to swim, isn’t it, 1/2 a mile?”
“Oh no, teacher, no, it was easy once I’d got out of the bag!”

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Two Saxophones After a Holiday

A man is returning from a holiday.
As he goes through customs, the officer asks him what’s in his two big bags.
“Mobile phones,” the man replies.
The officer opens the bags, and sure enough, both are packed with phones.
“What are you doing with all these?” the officer asks.
“Oh, they’re not for me. I’m helping out a friend. He’s starting a band.”
“But phones? Who needs phones when starting a band?”
The man pulls a crumpled piece of paper out of his pocket to double-check. “Yeah, this is exactly what he asked for — two saxophones.”

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