Why Scientists Don’t Trust Atoms
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
- Test User
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18+ content
Breathalyzer Twist Joke
She said, "When I put it in my mouth, do you want me to look into your eyes?"
I said, "Miss, just blow into the breathalyzer, please."
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- Daily Joke
The Traffic Misunderstanding
So a guy is sitting at a bar looking dejected. The bartender says, "What's wrong, buddy?"
The guy says, "My wife is divorcing me."
"Why? What happened?"
"Well," says the guy, "my wife said, 'If anything happens to me, I want you to meet someone new.'"
"So?" says the bartender.
And the guys says, "Apparently, 'anything' doesn't include getting stuck in traffic."
- Daily Joke
18+ content
Budget Meeting That Ended in Takeout
We had a family budget meeting to cut expenses.
Then we ordered takeout to save time.
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- Daily Joke
18+ content
Finally Got Eight Hours of Sleep
I finally got eight hours of sleep.
It took three days, but still.
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- Daily Joke
18+ content
My Bed vs My Alarm Clock
My bed and I are perfect for each other.
The alarm clock keeps trying to break us up.
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- Daily Joke
The Golfer’s Backup Plan
Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants?
In case he got a hole in one.
- Daily Joke
Why Basketball Players Are Messy Eaters
Why are basketball players messy eaters?
Because they dribble.
- Daily Joke
Cantaloupe Wedding
Why did the melons not get married?
Because they cantaloupe.
- Daily Joke
Crumby Cookie
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
It was feeling crummy.
- Daily Joke
Lettuce Celebrate
What did the lettuce say after winning the race?
Lettuce celebrate!
- Daily Joke
Monster’s Favorite Dessert
What is a monster's favorite dessert?
I scream.
- Daily Joke
Snowman Breakfast
What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Frosted flakes.
- Daily Joke
Elf Selfie Season
Why do elves take so many photos in December?
They love elfies.
- Daily Joke
Reaching the High Notes
Why did the music teacher bring a ladder?
To reach the high notes.
- Daily Joke
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