Socks in Microwave
Why did Dad put his socks in the microwave? He wanted them to be hot off the press!
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Browse every joke on Daily Joke in one place, with clean jokes, dad jokes, one-liners, animal jokes, work jokes, and more.
Coffee Bar Mix-Up
A guy walks into a coffee bar and asks for a strong drink. The barista hands him a double espresso!
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Vampire Happy Hour
Why don’t vampires drink at happy hour? Because the stakes are too high!
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Invisible Drink
A man orders an invisible drink at the bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don’t serve spirits you can’t see!"
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Dog Detective
Why did the dog become a detective? Because he had a nose for clues!
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Parrot Motivation
What did the parrot say to motivate its friend? "You can be anything, just wing it!"
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Cat Yoga
Why did the cat join a yoga class? To perfect its pawses!
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Stuck in the Elevator
Two guys are stuck in an elevator. One says, "Do you think the buttons still work?" The other says, "I don’t know. Press the ‘Help’ button and see."
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The Five-Year Plan Answer
An interviewer asks a candidate, "Where do you see yourself in five years?" The candidate replies, "Personally, I’d love to be a millionaire."
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Why Employees Bring Ladders
Why do employees always bring a ladder to work? Because the job has its ups and downs.
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The Raise Negotiation Strategy
I told my boss three companies were after me, so I needed a raise. He asked which ones. I said: gas, electric, and water.
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Why Skeletons Avoid HR
Why don’t skeletons work in HR? They don’t have the backbone.
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Saving Time at the Bank
Why did the man bring his watch to the bank? He wanted to save time.
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The Workplace Update Problem
My workplace is like a software update. It always wants to restart when I just got settled.
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Dressing for the Job You Want
They said dress for the job you want. Now I’m sitting in HR dressed as Batman.
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